What we generally perceive as self-care and what is true self-care are more than likely poles apart from what you first thought

Self-care isn't all that sexy after all

When you hear the term “self-care” used, what actually comes to mind? A long luxurious bath with ALL the fancy toiletries perhaps? What about a relaxing massage? Ooh I know, a spa day!

Okay, so while those things sound like fun, they’re not the foundation of true self-care. We need to reduce our expectations a little! Let’s talk about what I call the unsexy self-care strategy – the basic, essential practises that keep you functioning as a human being.

It may not look or feel glamorous or Instagram-worthy, but unsexy self-care is the foundation of everything else in your life. Without it, you can’t do anything else. You can’t show up for your family, your business, or even yourself. So, let’s break it down into three essential pillars: hydration, nutrition and sleep.

Why Is This So Important?

Before we dive into the specifics, let’s first understand why these basic needs are non-negotiable.

        Hydration - Our bodies are 60% water, and every little bio system we have going on inside our meat sacks we’ve been assigned whilst we’re here on earth depends on it to function. Staying hydrated improves brain function, energy levels and focus. Even mild dehydration can lead to fatigue, headaches, and difficulty in concentrating. Our brains are around 75% water, so it’s even more important for our cognitive functioning.

        Nutrition - Food is fuel for our bodies and brains. What we eat impacts our mood, energy levels, and the ability to cope with stress when it arises. Eating the right foods, in the right portion sizes ensures having the stamina to tackle the day.

        Sleep - Sleep is when our bodies repair themselves, and our brains process the information we’ve taken in during the day. Without adequate rest, everything from your immune system to your decision-making ability suffers. Sleep isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity.

If you’re familiar with Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs pyramid diagram, it describes five different levels of needs that motivate us as humans. Right at the top is self-actualisation, then moving down there’s self-esteem, love and belonging, and safety and security. Right at the bottom of the pyramid there is the physiological needs level that we need as humans in order to survive. If you had absolutely everything stripped away in life and had to start again (and I mean everything), your survival instincts and priorities would be to find food, water, warmth and shelter. If we don’t have these we will die. So considering these are essential for survival, why are so many people thinking they can skip them in favour of doing all of the other exciting things above them in the motivation hierarchy? We need to get the basics right first before we can even think about anything else.

Self-Care Pillar 1: Drink More Water

You’ve heard it all before! Drink more water. It’s simple advice, but are you actually doing it? I mean, I don’t blame you if you aren’t! Water is boring, I know. But without drinking enough of the stuff, we’re going to end up in a lot of trouble.

Why It’s So Important

Water helps to regulate your body temperature, it flushes out toxins and carries nutrients to your cells. Our bodies are so busy doing stuff at a cellular level – water is involved in most of these processes.

Proper hydration improves focus and reduces fatigue. Think of all the schools now that allow water bottles in class. It was unheard of when I was a kid! All I wanted to do was fall asleep in almost every lesson. Times have changed and the emphasis is on hydration to stay focused.

Dehydration can cause mood swings, headaches, and an all-round lack of energy. I had one big, long headache that spanned my entire childhood. At no point did my parents suggest to me to have a drink of water to combat it. It’s the first thing I ask the kids now if they say they’ve got a headache, or any other aches and pains. Funnily enough now I rarely get major headaches. It’s not a coincidence that I also drink a lot more water.

How to make it easier

Carry a reusable water bottle when you’re out and about, everywhere you go. I use a metal Systema 500ml bottle (I often take two out with me if it’s a longer day).

Set reminders on your phone to drink water throughout the day if you struggle to remember. This is particularly important if you are peri-menopausal or post-menopausal as hormone fluctuations also mess around with our normal physical “feelings” of thirst. I can confirm this is what’s happened with me. I no longer get “thirst” cues until I’m really dehydrated. So I need to be pro-active with my fluid intake.

Incorporate water-rich fruit and veg into your diet if you are able to, like cucumbers, watermelon and oranges. Sneak that H2O in wherever you can!

I’ll be honest, I really don’t like fruit so much and cucumber is one of the most uninspiring foods ever. I also struggle to drink plain water (or Corporation Pop as many of you Gen Xers will remember it being referred to by our Boomer parents), so I’m never far away from a pint glass of Vimto Cordial at home, or a bottle of the stuff when I’m out and about. I do juice occasionally so manage to get the hydrated goodness out of the fruit and veg, but it’s a messy and tedious task so doesn’t happen as often as it should

Just swap out what you can, where you can. I do think that if it’s the difference between drinking enough and not, I’d stick cordial in there. You can wean yourself off it at a later date if you want to, once drinking regularly has become a habit.

Self-Care Pillar 2: Eat The Right Foods

I want you to visualise your food as your fuel. So the quality of what you eat directly impacts how you feel and function, just like putting cheap fuel into your car. You get out what you put in. You wouldn’t expect to put sludgy fuel into your car and have it run properly. Your body is no different. If you eat rubbish you’re going to feel rubbish. Every time you eat, you have an opportunity to make a better choice. I find that I feel better mentally if I’ve eaten a healthier meal. When I have succumbed to a takeaway or processed junk, I mentally don’t feel great about it, because I know I can do better.

Why It’s So Important

  Eating protein-rich foods can help stabilise your energy levels and keeps you feeling fuller for longer. I eat mackerel on granary toast for breakfast, and it keeps me going for hours.

  Nutrient-dense meals provide the vitamins and minerals your body needs to operate efficiently. With the decline in quality of our fruit and veg, we should be trying to eat even more than the recommended “five a day”. Keep empty calories to a minimum. You body can’t do a thing with them!

Poor eating habits can lead to sluggishness, irritability, and possibly long-term health issues. If we’re not careful, we slip into this cycle of eating rubbish, feeling rubbish and then not moving enough because we have less energy. Pull yourself out of this as soon as you realise. You also won’t be showing up in your business as your best self. And your business needs you to be on top form! Think of all the effort you put into sales, marketing, making etc. Remember that you also need that effort spending on yourself too.

How to make it easier

Plan your meals in advance to avoid any last-minute unhealthy choices. This is so easy to slip up on, it can feel like you’re walking a tight-rope. Keep some healthier “quick meals” in, for those days when you are low on energy, but don’t want your face to fall into the nearest takeaway menu

IncI Include a balance of protein, some healthy fats, and complex carbohydrates in your meals. I’m not a nutritionist, but common sense would tell me to make sure I do this if I want to eat properly. You feel fuller for longer too, so there’s less chance of mid-morning and mid-afternoon snacking.

Avoid eating late at night, as this can disrupt your sleep cycle. Apart from not being able to get to sleep because you feel full, your body also needs around 12 hours of fasting in order to do its overnight “housekeeping”. If it’s busy digesting food, it can’t do all the other things so well. If you’re eating later in the evening, you’re disrupting these essential processes. Our morning meal isn’t called break-fast for fun! Our bodies need that amount of time to complete the cycles.

Don’t overhaul your entire diet overnight as you’re unlikely to sustain it. Start small: add an extra vegetable here and there to your plate, or swap processed snacks for healthier options. One change at a time is moving in the right direction.

Self-Care Pillar 3 – Get Enough Sleep

We’ve all pulled the occasional all-nighter to meet a pressing deadline, but consistently skimping on sleep is unsustainable. This can become tricky when you run a business. You may need to just get the work done. Or you work better under pressure (hello my ADHD’ers!). Whatever your work pattern, know that you need your sleep.

Why It’s So Important

During sleep, your brain consolidates memories, processes emotion, and repairs your body at a cellular level. As mentioned in the food section, our bodies have cellular housekeeping roles to perform and need to have enough time to do these overnight.

Lack of sleep impairs decision making, reduces productivity, and increases stress levels. I deal with brain fog on a regular basis thanks to menopause and fluctuating iron levels. I certainly don’t want to impact this further by not getting enough sleep.

Chronic sleep deprivation can lead to serious health problems like heart disease and weakened immunity. Basically, it affects everything. I know when I’m tired because my heart palpitations start and/or get stronger. It’s a solid sign for me to stop what I’m doing and go to bed. In an ideal world I shouldn’t be letting them get to that stage, except the world is not ideal, and I had a heart attack in 2020, thinking I could just carry on and not worry about proper rest. I can’t turn the clock back but I can do my best to warn the rest of you NOT to compromise on your basic needs.

How to make it easier

Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep each night, depending on what your body needs. My Apple Watch tracks my sleep and keeps track of when I’ve hit my targets.

Create a bedtime routine to signal to your brain that it’s time to wind down. This could include dimming the lights, reading a book, or meditating. I’ve started having a shower around 9pm and slowly sorting myself out for bed. I’ve switched to decaffeinated tea (because I do actually like a brew before bed), and things have vastly improved.

Limit screen time before bed. The blue light from devices can interfere with your body’s production of melatonin, the hormone that helps you sleep. I’ve now banned my phone after 9pm. Do I stick to it rigidly? Let’s just say that I know when I haven’t!

If you struggle to fall asleep, consider using apps for white noise or similar, blackout curtains, eye covers, lavender spray on your pillow; anything you can think of to improve your chances of getting to sleep quickly.

The Usual Objections

Many people struggle to meet these basic needs due to busy schedules, stress or misconceptions. Some of the common challenges may sound like:

         “I don’t have time to eat well.” Meal prep is your best friend. Spend a few hours on the weekend preparing meals or snacks for the week ahead. Start small with planning just a few days ahead. Then progress once it’s become more of a habit to a weekly, fortnightly, then monthly plan (remember it’s not set in stone!)

         “I don’t like drinking water.” Me neither! You could add natural flavourings like lemon, mint or berries to make it more appealing and you want to stay as healthy as possible. Or if you’re like me and don’t fancy that, your favourite Cordial, at least until it becomes a habit.

         “I’ll catch up on my sleep later.” Unfortunately, sleep isn’t something you can bank or batch task. Prioritise consistent sleep patterns instead. Our bodies need to do their overnight housekeeping. If we’re not giving it the chance to do this, we’re setting ourselves up for long term health issues.

The Ripple Effect Of Maintaining Your Unsexy Self-Care Routine

When you prioritise meeting these basic needs and make them a habit, the benefits ripple out into every area of your life:

         You’ll have a lot more energy to focus on your business and personal goals

         Your relationships will improve because you’ll feel less irritable and more present

         You’ll build resilience, making it easier to cope with stress and challenges

Unsexy self-care might not be glamorous, but it’s the foundation of a healthy, productive life. By prioritising hydration, nutrition and sleep, you’re setting yourself up for success in all areas of life.

Self-care doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive. Start with these basics and watch how much better you feel, even within a few days. It’s not about perfection; it’s about progress. When you start to take care of your basic needs, you become better equipped to take on everything else life throws your way.

So, go grab yourself a glass of water, plan out a healthy evening meal for tonight, and commit to getting a good night’s sleep. Even if you don’t feel like it, it’s worth the extra effort.

One of the ways that I define true self-care is to perform an action, or make a decision that takes care of your physical, mental, emotional, and/or spiritual wellbeing, and that it’s something that your future self will thank you for. So just keeping asking yourself when you get bored with doing all of this . . . what would my future self thank me for doing today?

Let me know if you’ve decided to start with these. Have I missed anything out? I’d love to hear from you. Leave me a comment, or come over and join one or more of my Facebook communities. The links are below.

Platespinning Academy Facebook Group

Nics North West Business Networking Group

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